Rainbow Stories: Creating Connections Through Shared Experiences

Heather Hester: 00:00:07

Welcome back. If you are listening to this as soon as it posts I hope you're having a beautiful holiday season. Whatever you celebrate and whomever you celebrate with me, you know love, laughter, peace and good health. Today's quick episode gives a sneak peek at the collaborative book my friend and joint venture partner Katherine Burrows and I are creating. We invite you to learn more about the movement. We're starting around the power of stories. And not just any stories, Rainbow stories.

Welcome to Just Breathe: 00:00:56

Parenting Your LGBTQ Teen, the podcast, transforming the conversation around loving and raising an LGBTQ child. My name is Heather Hester, and I am so grateful you are here. I want you to take a deep breath. And know that for the time we are together, you are in the safety of the just breathe nets. Whether today's show is an amazing guest, or me sharing stories, resources, strategies or lessons I've learned along our journey. I want you to feel like we're just hanging out at a coffee shop having a cozy chat. Most of all, I want you to remember that wherever you are on this journey, right now, in this moment in time, you are not alone.

Welcome to Just Breathe: 00:01:57

Hi, I am Heather Hester. And I am really happy to be here today to talk to you to share with you about Rainbow Stories, which is a collaboration between Katherine burrows and myself, where we are putting together a compilation book of for parents, teens and allies of stories and fright tell you any more about this amazing collaboration, I just want to tell you a little bit about myself. And the reason I am doing this and the reason why I feel this is such an important project. So when my son Connor came out almost six years ago, we really first of all, we were blindsided my husband and I had no idea and we did not have any idea of where to find information, we were really ill equipped as to how to support Connor and where to find support for kind of where to find good resources, good information, you name it, that we had a tough time finding it. And so kind of really, really struggled for quite some time. And we struggled for quite some time, across the board from mental health to just the coming out process and, and understanding that and understanding, you know, where he was in this process, having the overlay of you know, on top of just coming out as gay, he was also a teenager, he's 1617 at 18 years old, which, as we all know, is a difficult time just in and of itself. So there were a lot of layers to our process and a lot of things that we were having to learn very, very quickly and and to, to find the information to learn. And so about two years into our process, I thought you know what this is I don't want any other family to have to go through what we went through it was so difficult it was so heartbreaking. It was so scary in many many points. And and I thought you know what, there's, I want to make this easier for anybody I can possibly make this easier for. So I at that point started my website chrysalis mama, which initially started out as a resource website and a place for me to just offer information and share our story, share our stories and share our process. And then about a year after that I started my podcast just breathe parenting your LGBTQ teen, which just turned three years old. And and that became another way for me to will really reach out to people and share stories, share my story, share our stories and share allow, give a platform for others to share their stories, both experts in their respective in all of their fields. And then people who have just, you know how I have been on this journey. And it became such a lovely, wonderful way to connect with other parents and other kids and just human beings. And so along this journey, Catherine and I have met through a coaching group, and we really decided that what an awesome way like realizing between what the two each of us do, and you'll find out in a few minutes exactly what she does as well. But the power of being able to share a story and also the power of being able to see yourself in someone's story. And what that does, to alleviate that feeling of feeling alone. And feeling like no one else knows what you're going through. And feeling like there's just nothing out there. For me, there's no information for me. So I'm going to turn this over to Kathryn, before we go any further into what we're doing here, because I want you to, to hear all about her as well.

Katherine Burrows: 00:06:33

So I have a lovely blended family, which includes a young person who identifies as non binary. But my, my bigger role in this is bringing in the element of stories and my lifelong love of writing, my lifelong love of reading, and just a passion in general for stories. Those stories are really how we communicate with each other, over 65% of all human conversations take the form of stories. You know, we tell each other about our day, we tell a colleague about a meeting that they may have missed, we talk to our children, we talk about our children, we tell stories of family history, stories of events that have passed, stories of the traditions that we're carrying on. And if you look, you know, even to sporting events, news stories, it's how we communicate on a larger scale, globally as well. So I've been passionate about writing stories. And I've actually built my business around helping others to tell their stories through ghost writing, and through book coaching. And I primarily work with business owners. And one of the things that I've really loved that's come to my attention in my 13 plus years of writing professionally, is that the character of who that business owner is, is so integral to telling the story of that business. And so I created my own intellectual property called the Business character analysis, where I really look at who each business owner is when they come on board as a client. And they get their one defining characteristic, which is that personality trait that's really who they are, how they show up in their business, there are three supporting characteristics that enhance that defining characteristic. And then the culminating result, which is the magic that happens when all of that those characteristics come together, just to give amazing benefits to their clients. And so, in talking with Heather, and also in a recent experience of writing an article on one of our local pride groups, I've really come to realize how important the stories are particularly about people's experiences in the LGBTQ community. And it's so much about who you are, who we all are as human beings. And bringing that out and bringing that to benefit other people so that they can identify with those stories. They can see themselves in those stories. They can remember those stories and find support in them in those moments that they feel alone, because we remember information that is presented in stories up to 22 times more than facts alone. So we can give a teenager a pamphlet that says you know here's some support and here's some numbers you can call. But if they've read a story that they really identify with, of someone who's had a similar experience maybe a few years ago, they're going to remember that story far more than they remember what's in a pamphlet. And so Heather and I just are so excited to work together to bring all of this support and all of these stories together and get them out into the world so that more voices are heard more voices are raised. Because stories inspire us to dream. They help us to find the courage to act, then they serve as a medium to celebrate and immortalize our achievements. And that's really what we want to do with this rainbow stories compilation book. So Heather, do you want to chat a bit about our vision for this book?

Heather Hester: 00:10:44

Yes, I do. I think you did just a lovely, lovely job of, of really talking about how the power what, what power a story has. And that's not something that's just for a specific group of people, right? That's forever a human being. Stories have power. And when you think about what stories you've read, in your lifetime, that have moved you think about why why those stories moved you. And were you able to connect Was it because you were able to connect to the person that was writing the story, or the main character of the story or something that happened in the story. There are so many reasons that a story does have power. And you know, as Katherine I were talking about doing this, and realizing just how far reaching this can really go. It's not only the power of these stories for individuals, it's I often think when I'm working with people and working with families, and you know, working with my own kids, that one of the things that we talk about a lot is actually knowing somebody reading a story about something that's happened to a specific person, right, instead of like reading a statistic, like you just said, reading on a pamphlet hearing a news story where you hear something that's really kind of disconnected, something that you really can't necessarily relate to. But if you read a story about or if somebody tells you a story about a specific person, then it's so much like automatically easier to relate to right or to understand or for you to have compassion, or for you to be curious instead of judgmental. So there are a lot of beautiful possibilities for this book. And the more we talk about it, the more we are excited to offer this opportunity for anyone listening, anyone anybody seeing this to share their story. Because as you know, not only can that be just inspiring, it can be life saving.

Katherine Burrows: 00:13:16

And we really have a larger vision of this becoming a movement. Because I think now more than ever, and I'm sure you agree with this, Heather, there's so much fear in the world that we really need to be constantly fighting against. And I think the best way to combat that fear and to cause it to dissipate is through information and knowledge and educating people. And so the more voices are heard, and the more people understand that the wonderful people of this world who identify with the LGBTQ community, are such a rich and diverse part of our world, and part of our greater communities, and that they bring so much value through that diversity. And, you know, voices need to be heard by these people, so that they can understand. We're all human. We all have the same concerns. Here. We all want to be able to have a job that supports our families. We all want a safe place to live. We all want to be able to enjoy life, find something that we're passionate about and be able to do that. That thing that brings us joy. So when people can see themselves in the stories of our compilation book, and when the greater community who may maybe doesn't have that personal experience or doesn't have a close family member with that experience, they can learn to what it is like to go through these things and be more understand Thinking and hopefully become an ally and an advocate. So we are hoping together Heather and I that you are willing to share some part of your story or a message for the world. Some form of creative writing that's original could be poetry could be prose, or some sort of artistic expression, a painting, a sculpture, even a photograph, but something that can be transformed into a photograph that we can put in a book,

Heather Hester: 00:15:35

I was just thinking of a conversation that you and I had the other night with somebody who shared a very specific incident. And we thought, Gosh, this is such a, that in and of itself is such a beautiful way to share something. So you know, we we want to inspire you to brainstorm we want you to to inspire you to think about how your story, your message, your experience, can change somebody else's life can help somebody else. And I think that sometimes we don't realize that our voice does have that power to be able to positively affect someone else. And so that is one of the many reasons that Katherine and I are so excited about putting this together and offering this opportunity for you to be able to give you a platform to share.

Katherine Burrows: 00:16:36

Yeah, so anything that you wish people knew people in your support circle other people, like co workers, or the person at the grocery store, you know, whatever you wish people knew, and what something you think people could benefit from that would really help them as they go through that journey that you have already been through. And you're a little bit further ahead on. So as Heather said, it could be one, you know, specific evening in your life that was very influential. Or it could be a bit about your journey over several decades, where you touch on some turning points in your life. So just whatever you feel called to share. We would love to help you bring your voice forward and get it out into the world because all of you have such beautiful voices, and we can't wait to hear from you.